Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Pain and Pleasure

A recent dream that my Mistress had and shared with me motivated me to explore today the topic of pain and how it relates to pleasure and to helping me to feel my submission more deeply. First let me clearly state that I am not much of a masochist or pain seeker. Yet the concept of how closely related yet distinct are the sensations of pain and pleasure, cause me to see the experience of pain at some level as an integral part of my experience set as I continue my journey of submission. I do acknowledge that I have limited say as to the degree of pain my Mistress might wish to inflict on me and my various body parts, but I trust her implicitly to use discretion because I am completely convinced that she does not wish me any real harm and will exercise good judgment in this area.

Thus far I have had very limited experiences with pain, really what I’ve experienced would probably be more accurately described as periods of slight discomfort rather than pain itself which seems to hold the connation of sharpness of sensation. I have experienced clothespins on my nipples, cock and balls. I recently purchased a pair of nipple clamps that I have tried on my nipples and found to be quite intense. I have spanked my bottom with a wooden spoon at the command of my Mistress. I have experienced light whipping of my genitals and the tender flesh of my inner thighs. Finally I have endured a larger size anal plug than I was able to comfortably accept.

When I think of pain I most usually feel that my greatest attraction is for spanking. I am willing to explore being spanked barehanded or spanking with implements (spoon, rulers, paddles, etc.) I would like to experience cropping, canning, flogging and whipping at least up to a mild to moderate level. I have read so many fascinating accounts by other submissives that describe the sub space experiences they have had while being enduring these corporal activities. Pain seems to be the pathway that leads to sub space and I would like to experience that. I also see this as a fertile area for deepening my own submissive experience.

My favorite fantasy involving pain and my Mistress is having her make me drop my pants and underwear and she then gives me an over the knee spanking in a public place like a city park. I imagine I am being spanked for some minor act of disobedience. I visualize not crowds of people on hand but a few curious onlookers who witness the scene which adds to my feelings of embarrassment and humiliation. Honestly, I wouldn’t really want to experience this fantasy with respect to the public place part but the idea of receiving an over the knee spanking from my Mistress is very erotic and arousing to me.

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